Self-confidence, or the lack thereof, is an important element in our day-to-day dealings with the world around us. It can make the difference between success and failure, from the unimportant to the life changing. So what do you do to give yourself a boost when your confidence is flagging, and you need to keep swimming, or even just stay afloat? If you’re adrift at sea and you need to make some big changes in life, start by employing these small steps to create a new outlook on life, and see if they don’t begin to make a difference.
First off, everything in life begins with baby steps. Don’t expect to change yourself and your outlook overnight. Setting unrealistic goals is the quickest way to not reach them, and is a real self-confidence killer if you’re always failing to achieve them. Another way to blow it before you ever really get started is by setting too many lofty goals at once. This is the impracticality of most of our New Year’s resolutions. If you want to quit smoking, lose weight, get in better shape, and work on new-found patience all at the same time, you’re setting yourself up for failure. Start small and concentrate on that one achievable goal and see where it gets you before upping the ante.
So, you’ve been passed over for that job or that promotion you’ve had your eye on, and you’re understandably disappointed. Beating yourself up is not the answer. Rather than negatively scrutinizing your every move, see if you can get some positive feedback from the interviewer, or the director in charge of promotions at your current place of employment. If it’s at your current job, they should be more than willing to let you know which factors determined your exclusion from the position and where you need to hone your skills, and if it’s a new job, once the flurry of hiring activity has died down they should be able to provide you with some input as to why they selected another candidate. Either way, don’t take it personally, accepting constructive criticism is the only way we grow in life unfettered by our own narrow-minded limitations. Working to improve yourself by making simple changes and getting training to enhance your skills set is a start in the right direction for overcoming your weaknesses and gaining more self-confidence .
This may sound overly simple, but try applying yourself to something you feel passionately about and really go for it. Study it, experiment with it, and improve on it. Throw yourself in with both feet and really give it your all. Mastering something, anything, can really give you a sense of pride that is a real boost to your self-confidence, and it soon becomes infectious and takes over in other aspects of your life as well. This means really applying yourself, though, and not just going through the motions. We are our own best friends and our own worst enemies. Remember, you have to start somewhere.
You’d be amazed at what some of the simplest changes we make can do for our self-confidence. As silly as it may seem, a new haircut, dropping or gaining a few pounds, an updated wardrobe, having our teeth whitened or straightened, all of these things can give us an instant boost in the way we feel about ourselves.