Being over-controlling; this is one of the main warning sign of abusive men. With this control often comes; criticism, verbal abuse, and other hurtful demeaning behaviors, and taking little consideration of you as an individual. Here are the top seven signs that can help you spot this man.
Refuses to take responsibility
Men who are abusive find it difficult to accept criticism; they feel that they are always right. Furthermore, they try to justify their actions by blaming their spouses, or someone else, when things go wrong. They have a strong sense of entitlement, but find it very difficult to take responsibility for their actions.
An important red flag is the way he obsessively tries to control you and your life. He is excessively demanding of you, and tries to control all aspects of your life including your time and finances. Initially you might mistake this as a caring attitude; however, this jealous and possessive attitude affects your relationships with your friends and family members. He tries to separate you from the people you love, thus making you more dependent on him.
One of the most striking signs of abusive men is their unpredictable behavior. This makes you uncertain of what to expect next. His mood swings move erratically from one extreme to the next. He can be very abusive to you and then the next minute he is apologetic and caring.
Poor anger management
Abusive men get angry easily, and find it difficult to control their temper. They find it hard to handle their anger to effectively deal with problem situations. It takes very little for them to blow up, and these angry outbursts keep you constantly on edge. If you are in a relationship with an abusive man you will find that he constantly vents his frustrations on you, and this may take various forms including verbal and physical attacks .
Diminishes your self-esteem
One of the most severe results of being in a relationship with an abusive man is the toll it takes on your self-esteem. He constantly tells you that you are stupid to make you feel bad about yourself. The problem is that after a while, you might even start believing it. You end up thinking that you’re not being good enough to him, or that trying to anything new isn’t worthwhile. This poor self-image could stop you from achieving important life goals, such as completing college or pursuing a career.
Abusive men constantly try to manipulate their spouses to get their own way. He refuses to give you the love or affirmation you need, because he thinks that you have not lived up to his high standards. So he withdraws, and gives you the silent treatment to make you feel guilty.
Abusive men constantly break their promises because of their lack of respect for their spouses. While they expect you to be perfect and do everything right, you cannot depend on them to responsibly carry out their end. When you try to point this out, this could spark angry outbursts, blame, and further abuse.
If you feel that any of these behaviors are taking place in your marriage or relationship, it might be wise to talk with a friend or family member about it, you can always seek help from a licensed therapist who can advise you on how to handle this kind of man.