Getting through a first date to ensure there are others

So you’ve gone and met that special someone that you’re actually interested in dating. It’s a red letter day when that finally happens, and the excitement and anticipation of your first date is making you giddy. What to wear, where to go, and what you’ll eat are all thoughts whirling through your head. You want everything to be perfect. But besides how fabulous you’ll look in that new dress you’ve been dying to wear and the fact that you’ve found the perfect shade of crimson nail polish to match, there are some things to think about in advance to help you ensure there wil be a second date.

Dress Accordingly

A few things to remember when you’re about to embark on a first date are wardrobe and makeup choices and the impression you’ll leave. Depending on the guy, you probably already have an inkling of his style preference to help you in deciding what to wear. If at all possible, though, see if you can find out what your date has planned so you can dress accordingly. If it’s a surprise, ask for a hint and explain why so that he doesn’t think you’re being a spoiler alert. Nothing’s worse than showing up in the wrong outfit and being over or under dressed for the occasion. Along the same lines, consider what message your outfit is sending. If it screams you’re easy, it could prompt reactions either way that you may not have anticipated nor wish to deal with. Makeup goes the same way, and remember that less is always better unless you’re planning on being extras in a music video.

Me, Me, Me & More

You’ve made it to the restaurant without breaking your ankle in those stilettos you haven’t worn in ages, and you couldn’t be happier with his choice. So far, so good. Now comes the really tricky part. Of course you don’t want to sit there like a bump on a log, and naturally there will be small talk before, during, and after the meal, but do your best to monitor your contribution to the conversation. The last thing you want to do on a first date is monopolize the conversation by talking nonstop about yourself. This is something a lot of people do without realizing it, especially when they’re nervous. Try to keep it in check. Be a good listener and ask him general questions about his life and family to let him know you’re interested in really getting to know him, but don’t be intrusive.

What Not to Say or Ask

There are certain questions that are off limits on a first date that will send him running quicker than an Olympic sprinter. Never ever ask him about his finances this early on. The only time that’s ever appropriate is if you’re actually planning on having some sort of living arrangement with him down the road. Unless they volunteer it, asking a man about how much money he makes or what shape his savings account is in or what kind of car he drives is the absolute kiss of death. Another topic of discussion to avoid is both your exes, period. Don’t even consider it. Also, keep complaining to an absolute minimum. Nobody likes a whiner.

Goes Without Saying

Finally, these last first date tips go without saying, but don’t talk with your mouth full (ick!), don’t play with your phone (your ringer should already be turned off), and give him the undivided attention he deserves — just as you’d have him do for you on a first date.